Toi et moi (2006)**

Toi et Moi is a French romantic comedy so wantonly insipid it seems to have been designed for the sole purpose of entertaining airline passengers. Here we learn all about Julie Depardieu (Julie Depardieu) and Marion Cotillard (Marion Cotillard) and their tedious search for love in the glorious city of Paris. At least I think its Paris; it could be Council Bluffs, Iowa.

At any rate, Depardieu is, for some unknown reason, in a long term relationship with a very creepy fellow named Farid (Tomer Sisley), who cheats on her at every opportunity, constantly degrades and insults her and literally emanates sleaze. Yet, she is head-over-heels crazy about him, and we are shown, in precious greeting-card style animated sequences, her hopes and dreams for their idyllic life together.

Cotillard plays a B-list cellist who has fallen hard for a visiting violin soloist (Jonathan Zaccaii) who is so arrogant and full of himself that, in a just world, he would be taken out and shot. The girls spend much of the picture mooning and moping over these two shmendriks, and yes, after a while, you just want to slap them. At some point, Depardieu wins the attentions of a Spanish carpenter (Sergio Peris Mencheta), apparently proving the seldom heard theory that what women really want is an immigrant minimum-wage laborer. I suppose this is true; come to think of it I do see a lot of lonely looking gals hanging out at Lowes. I'm sorry this review is not better, but I either fell asleep or simply don't remember much else about the film. But I'm sure other things happened eventually