We have recently started accepting classified advertising. Email us to respond to any of the ads below:
For Sale: 1994 Renault. Good car, considering it was made in France.
Lost: Near shopping mall. Grumpy old man with horrible flatulence. If found, please do not return.
Yard Sale: Saturday at 7am. Clothes, shoes, books and old smelly stuff covered in ick
Free to Good Home: Good Lord, my wife must have 200 freaking cats. Please come get some
Work Wanted: Man with tools and truck seeks work in international finance.
For Sale: Cowboy Hat, by man who has come to his senses.
Help Wanted: Work from home. If you have a computer and access to top secret government files, I can show you how to make a fortune!
For Rent: 4 bdrm house. A school, churches nearby, large snake in basement seems friendly.
Work Wanted: Shakespearean actor seeks gainful employment. Noble in reason, infinite in faculties, no votary to fond desire. Have own tights.
For Sale: Like new 6 person hot tub. Never peed or vomited in.
Public Notice: On Tuesday night, the City Council will vote to build a ridiculously expensive stadium that will house yet another mediocre, poorly run, suck-ass sports team. You and your children will be footing the bill for decades to come. The public is invited to attend.